Spam killed so far
With gym lights fading, another great basketball season bites the dust. Let’s pause and remember those carbon-based bipedal life forms who truly make the game a consternating battle.
The crew had assembled in a gym that fateful night,
Their shoes were super shiny and pants were fitting tight.
Watching the teams warming up on the wooden floor,
Their arms folded upon their chests, studly to the core.
I’ve been ripped off just like millions of other baby boomers. We didn’t get a 4-day school week! All through my public school experience I was a maverick of Less is More (aka L&M) pedagogy — yet today’s students get it handed to them on a silver platter.
A growing number of astute school districts are becoming economic geniuses, realizing product scarceness drives up the price. Providing students less knowledge causes that knowledge to be worth more – hence less is more. Longer hours and fewer days can reduce operating costs while producing graduates with less, more-valuable knowledge.
L&M logic couldn’t be any clearer if as a person’s eyelids were taped open and the pupils coated with Vaseline! Shoot, I had this figured out in first grade. Here are some of my classic L&M economic techniques that still work today:
I passed out, dead on the table, getting the blood test for our marriage license. So writing about the tattoo industry gives me clammy palms. But as a faux journalist, I’m determined to share the gory details.
A recent U.S. Food and Drug Administration report warns that getting a tattoo poses serious health risks if done improperly — which, from my point of view, is AT ALL. They also warn consumers not to buy or eat imported fish labeled as monkfish — you have to take these people seriously.
Thinking about getting a tattoo? Make sure it’s performed professionally in a sanitary, air-conditioned strip mall — not some sleazy bar where the barkeep is serving warm, light beer and goes by the name Louie the Stud.
Louie practices unconventional approaches like iron-on tattoos. But most of the shops use an electric tattoo machine that inserts pigment under the skin via a group of needles. These sharp projectiles, used for torture in Asia Minor countries, are repeatedly driven into the skin (now get this) from 80 to 150 times a second. Just a minute, I’m feeling queezy. (more…)